Eleven.

Today, I am eleven months sober and all I could think about was how much I wanted a drink.

This isn't uncommon for me, as I am an alcoholic, and I often romanticize the drink. I think of how much more social I was, how much easier it was to make friends, how much I loved to dance and have a good time...

But then I try to remember the bad. The things I've pushed so far out of my mind they're almost impossible to think of again.

I remember the shakes, the sleepless nights, the drinking to cure the hangover, the isolation, the loneliness I felt even when I was in a crowded bar. I think about all of those things and I remind myself one drink isn't worth it. (And one drink is never just one drink with me, no matter how much I wish it could be...)

This is how I try to snap myself out of it. I think of the bad that I don't want to remember and think about how much my life has changed for the better...

I walked out of an incredibly toxic situation, I graduated a Master's program in Student Affairs, and I moved across the fucking country. The girl who went to college five minutes down the road from her family moved about as far as she could think without having to fly.

It's incredible to think how much can change in a person's life in just eleven months.

This journey hasn't been easy, and I'm sure there's even more rough roads ahead, but I have today and that's what matters.

So whatever you're going through, no matter how shitty it may be, just remember to take it one day at a time. You'll get through it, and I'll be here to listen when you need me to.

<3